1st Semester: CHECK!

Well I'm not sure if I'll be blogging in the next few weeks, because my friends, I am done! I have finished my 1st Semester. I have done it! I have finished the race! Oh there is still so much more to go but I need to bask in the glow of the fact that I have actually made it through one quarter of the nursing program!!! Many times there were doubts that I could do it. I've cried, laughed, screamed, wanted to quit, felt like I could actually do it, felt that it was impossible and had every other emotion imaginable up to this point. Until January 10th I'll be enjoying my laziness. Watching TV, sleeping, reading novels and not textbooks, regularly exercising, working, and anything else my heart desires. I can now enjoy Christmas and New Years. There's not much to say about the week but here it goes:

• Monday was my Birthday! It ended up being a really great Birthday. I took my Pharmacology Final and ended up with a 90%! Not my best score but it meant I still got my A for the semester!!
• I also found out on my Birthday that I got switched from clinical group ABC to group DEF which is now just group DF and I'm in the D section. One entire section of clinical was dropped cuz that many people have dropped/failed. That really sucks. I'm so thankful I'm actually getting to go to 2nd Semester. I will now have clinical at St. Micheal's Hospital and I won't have to go to St. Joseph's until the Middle of April. HUZZAH!!! I get to save some gas for the most part this semester!! The best part? No driving to Marshfield in January!!!
• I have been stressing and freaking out about my final final which was Fundamentals. The bane of my 1st Semester Existence. I was hovering at an 82.5% exam average and you need that solid 80.00% to pass, 79.99% is not good enough. That's failing. Well I was basically shaking all the way up to it this afternoon and I knew that this was the make it or break it part of my semester. Pass this one and I move on, fail and I stay behind. Hearing things about it from it being easy to being difficult I began taking it. It wasn't so bad. After going through the 80 questions I had 11 left blank. I filled them in and stared at 2 questions and finally decided and went to hand it in. I had to ask my prof what the answer to that one was and she told me. Damn, that one was wrong. Now time to sweat. Grades were to be posted by 6pm.  One of my classmates texted me around 4:30 saying that grades were posted. I was shaking, my heart was pounding, I was literally crying cuz I knew my fate was posted on a simple computer screen. I looked at my final grade: B-. Okay, but what's my exam average? OH. MY. GOD! I got an 89% on the Final. I not only passed that beast, but I did better on it than all my quizzes and my midterm. I had shown tremendous growth in that class. I have absolutely no idea how I did it but I passed that test. Praise the Lord and Pass the Ammunition!!!!!

17 Weeks (but it sounds better as 1 Semester) down! 3 Semesters to go!!!!

Almost Done!

The end of this week brought to a close 2 of my classes. Skills Lab and Clinical. By the grace of God, countless prayers and an unknown mystery of how I got this far have allowed me to accomplish this feat. It is huge, but I still have so much more to go.

• I had one last thing to do in Skills Lab. That was my final physical assessment. I brought in my little brother Cory and assessed him. I ended up with a 99%. I had lost two 1/2 points. One half point was cuz I didn't have my hands positioned correctly while doing a Thyroid Assessment and the other half was another position error, while percussing the Patellar Reflex. All in all I was very happy with my score. It ensured my A for the semester in that class. YAY! My prof was so impressed by my exam that she said she wished she could've taped it for future semesters cuz it was so well done. Not to gloat, but I was proud. Take that Dr. Divis!!
• I finished out Clinical with a blue paper of death. On Thursday I took my Pharmacology ATI test and all but 2 people walked out of it with the blue paper of death. Which means:  YOU FAILED!!! I got a 58%. Whoops! It was so frickin hard! To fix the problem I had to practice at home then retake it. I did that right away on Thursday and finished it.
• To finish off Clinical about an hour and a half after receiving the blue slip of death I had Simulations! Sims is the greatest way to make you crap your pants. In 1st Semester you actually get your scenarios and can practice. Not so in the other semesters. Well I had Mrs. Sugar who couldn't breathe and needed insulin. I kinda flubbed up a bit when I was drawing up my insulin and contaminated my needle, but threw it out and got a new one. Then I totally forgot to do some education. I ended up losing 4 points with a 90%. My reaction when I was told: "Works for me." I ended Clinical with an A- for a final grade. Not too shabby!
• Pharmacology gave me my last quiz. 98%. I also submitted my final worksheet. Of course there is one messed up question where you can't get it right and it ticks me off. Oh well. Just a final left in that class and I'm done.
• Fundamentals will make or break my semester. I have an 82.5% test average, which means if I don't get at least an 80% on my Final, I'll most likely fail the class. If I fail, I will have to retake it, not move on to 2nd Semester and not be guaranteed to get into 2nd Semester next fall. Pray for me. It would suck to get this far and fail. I've got a lot of studying to do.

I have 2 days of classes left. 2 days of taking 2 finals. I need to do this. Otherwise I'll be a FAILURE!!
Oh and Happy Birthday to me! I'm really old now!

It decided to snow yesterday. Yuck!

16 Weeks Completed! 2 Days & 3 Semesters to go!

1st Semester Clinical...Check!

From the title you can see that I have checked my 1st Semester Clinical off of my list! Today I had my last clinical day. The last clinical day where I only have one patient. My last clinical day at Riverview (at least until possibly March). My last Clinical day with this group of women. My last Clinical day with 3 different instructors (or I hope to God it is!) The day I got to do my first real Saline Lock! The day I actually knew all the meds I was administering and what they did (minus one) when I was asked about them! The day I didn't want to be at clinical but I was glad I went cuz I need all the Clinical hours I can get! The Semester is winding down and with that my work load (thank God!)

• Skills Lab is over! That actually makes me really sad. I love skills lab. I'm gonna miss my skills classmates, we were like the perfect group together. I'm gonna miss my instructor, cuz she was awesome! I learned so much in there as well as had many scary moments, especially when I had to test out on stuff. 
• On my last day of skills lab I tested out of my last two skills. Those were IV Piggyback Meds (crazy name, right?) and regulating an IV Pump. I passed with flying colors! I also took my last Skills quiz and it was harder than hell. I got an 87%, whew!! I thought I bombed that one!
• Even though class is over for Skills Lab, I still have my Physical Assessment. I'm taking my little brother Cory with me and I get to assess him. I'm hoping I do alright on that. It would be nice to put one last good grade in my gradebook for that class. I do that on Wednesday, practice, practice, practice!
• If you couldn't tell, Clinical is over!! However, I still have to do Simulations or Sims for short where there is a practice dummy that talks and has a heart beat, breathes, throws up, etc. I am given a scenario and I have to go in there and act like I'm his nurse and in essence make him better. I'm nervous as hell! 15 minutes of sweating and heart pounding fun, that's on Thursday. I also have to take a Pharmacology ATI test Thursday morning. That will suck major balls!!
• Speaking of ATI, I took the Fundamentals exam on Wednesday and all my practice ones were really good, then I take the real one. I felt like a dumbass, cuz it was harder than hell. I passed it but just barely with an 82%.  Which is awesome cuz otherwise I'd have to retake it until I pass it.
• I also took another pharmacology exam in Clinical and our instructor gave us a review which she said if we knew the information she presented in the reveiw, we'd be golden for our exam.  And then I got the test and yea, I felt really ill prepared. I don't know how I did it, but I managed a 95%, one wrong. I guessed right on about 6 or so questions. Glad that one's over.
• I got my graded care plan back and like a dumbass, never attached my bibliography. So I lost 3 points on that, and with the other couple of errors, I got a 93% on it. Oh well, when I did that thing at 3:30am, I was just glad to have it over.
• Oh and I got my 23 page Physical Assessment paper back. I knew it was graded and I could've looked at my grade online but I didn't want to on account of my brain coming up with 2 nightmares while I slept that I bombed that thing. So I just waited until I got the actual paper back. I got (drum roll please.............................) 98%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't believe it! I almost crapped my pants! I WIN!!!!!
• Last weekend I was lazy lazy lazy. Kassandra and I also went to see Breaking Dawn Part 2. It was awesome cuz what I wanted to happen in the book actually happened! Everyone started fighting and most of them died!!! Of course it was just one of Alice's visions, but it was like YES!!! Something is actually happening!! The movie was a nice break and got my mind off of school. This weekend I will be busting my ass off learning my physical assessment stuff, sims and pharm practice. It will be a fun time. NOT!!

I now have, my friends, 15 weeks completed. I have 2 weeks (well actually 5 actual class days) and 3 Semesters to go!!

Thanksgiving!!!

Whoever was the ass that decided to extend the semester past thanksgiving is an ass. With that said, I did enjoy my short week of classes!

• Thanksgiving is early this year. It is screwing with me. I feel like I have either no time left in the semester or Thanksgiving wasn't supposed to happen yet. Well it's happened and made me really lazy with school especially since I had off of work this weekend.
• I had to take a pharmacology quiz on Friday, that was fun. Not! haha, no it was fine I just hate quizzes. I was supposed to take a fundamentals one too, but something screwed up when the prof posted it, so I get to take it late!
• I only had 2 days of classes, and no clinical. It was a nice break!
• I finished testing out of trach stuff this week and we started IV's, I can take out IV's and spike/regulate them. I took a quiz too but I don't remember what I got on it. Oh well.
• Not much to report this week, since it was short. Sorry!

14 weeks down. 3 weeks and 3 semesters to go!!!!!!!!

There's a Light at the End of This Tunnel...

As you can tell the end is near. I can't believe I've made it this far. I'm very close but the pressure of the 1st Semester is starting to move in with all the crap that I still have to do!

• Clinical was kinda mellow this week. I did however get to administer insulin! I did it right this time!!! I WIN!!! Friday was the first day I did not give an injection at clinical. Oh well, my patient left right after 10am so I had the rest of the morning to accumulate my information for my big paper.
• Oh Lord, the BIG PAPER! Which I totally slacked on, pulled an almost all nighter on. It ended up being 23 pages long. I don't think it was longer than my exegesis I did for PBS II, but it ranked among the top. I have no idea what my grade will be but I'm hoping at least an 85%. That concluded my papers for the semester! Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition!
• I had another quiz in skills lab. An 80% for me. Either I'm getting stupider or they're getting harder. I think they are getting harder. I tested out flushing nasogastric tubes and giving meds in them. I also tested out on tracheotomy suctioning and replacing the dressing on them. Those were supposed to be scary skills but they weren't that bad.
• That's all I have to say about that.

13 weeks down! 4 weeks and 3 semesters to go!!

Slacking on the Blogging...

I'll admit it, I'm blogging a little late. I will try to remember the key elements from the last week!

• This was the week that killed me. Literally. I was so ready to die. Over the weekend I had a sore throat and a stuffy nose. At first I thought that it was allergies but oh no! I got the full blown flu! Flu shot my ass! If anything, that GAVE me the flu. Nursing majors have been dropping like flies and I was one of them. I worked the weekend then Monday. Monday night I was working on my Pharmacology Worksheet and I pretty much passed out. My bones were cold, everything hurt. I ended up staying home on Tuesday. I missed skills lab and pharmacology. I missed a quiz and testing out of skills. It sucked. Needless to say, Wednesday I went back to school but felt so much better cuz I NEEDED sleep.
• So in skills lab I retook my quiz from Tuesday on Wednesday and got a 79%. That quiz was really hard. Then I had a second one that I took and got a 95% on it, whew! I also tested out of skills for irrigating a urinary catheter, obtaining a urine specimen from a catheter, irrigating a colostomy and placing a new colostomy device. Lots of stuff but I got it all done!!
• Clinical meant giving 2 more subq's of Lovenox! I am getting to be a shot expert, well, in the stomach.
• I also had my process recording to write for clinical. I have to admit that that was the most retarded paper I've ever written. I had to have a conversation with a resident from long term care then write it out verbatim and comment on the non verbal language. Then I had to write what I did well in my communicating and what I needed to improve it. It was beyond stupid and I got a 92% on it. Thank God that's over!
  
  12 weeks down, 5 weeks and 3 semesters to go!

Sterile Technique Gets Me Everytime!

I still can't believe I'm on the downward slope of the hill! And what I can't believe about that is I'm so far passing all my classes! There are so few weeks left, however those few weeks pack a HUGE punch. I have more assignments, tests, papers, test outs and craziness than all of the 11 completed weeks combined! Just one day at a time!

•  The best thing that happened this week happened in Fundamentals.  We got our Midterms back, as in we got to see the test and look at which ones we got right and wrong and not just a percentage.  As I looked it over I realized that one of my answers that I had right on the hard copy of the test was marked wrong on the scantron. Either I messed up filling in the bubbles or the scantron messed up. I told my prof that I'm mad at myself for screwing up, and she said, "I'll give it to you!" I was like "Seriously?! I PASSED!!!!" So I bumped my score from a 78% to an 80%. I passed the midterm! I was very pleased!
• I had a paper due on a case study for Fundamentals. I didn't get it back yet, but according to the grade book I got a 97%. I'm happy about that!
• I didn't have any quizzes in Sills Lab this week. PTL!
•  In clinical I got to give my first Subcutaneous Injection!!! (or 3!) Everyone else in my clinical group only gave oral meds. I also got to watch an MRI and a GI Endoscopy. So I had a great clinical week!
• I finished my week off by writing my entire Cultural Assessment Paper, a Care Plan, and Journal. It takes sooooo long to do these clinical busy work assignments and when you add working the entire weekend to the mix, you are ready to die!  Mostly because I'm sick so it just makes everything 10 times worse.
• Now the worst part of me week: We tested off on inserting and removing catheters! I failed this skill. Skill wise, it was flawless, however I touched the outside of the carton with my sterile glove, twice. I knew I did it, and if I would've said something like "I touched the carton, I need to change my gloves" I would've passed. But dummy me didn't say anything and I failed. That meant I had to go into skills lab and retest out and I did fine. All three skills so far with Sterile Technique, I've flubbed somewhere, but this time it got me. Now I'll never screw up on sterile technique again.

11 weeks down, 6 weeks and 3 semesters to go!

Midterms & Acute Care Clinical!!

Well, kids! I have made it through Midterms. I have learned a few things and I have a few things to share.

• First and foremost, I need to learn how to not favor studying for one over the other. I have always had this problem and since pharmacology makes more sense, I spent the better part of my time studying for this one. 
• I got a heads up that the pharm midterm was basically verbatim from the midterm worksheet. I studied off of that one alot but I also didn't want her to change the test when it got to us so I also studied other stuff too. That test was on a computer so we got instant results. It was pretty much verbatim off the worksheet give or take 5 questions. I got a 98%. Not to brag, but I was happy (I say that with a big grin on my face.)
• My first Skills Lab quiz went well on the eyes and ears assessment. I got a 94%. The second one was on Medication Administration. I got an 87%. Not my best test but it was a hard one. So I was pleased.
•  I got to test off on 3 skills this week. IM Injection, Injection Sites and Mixing Insulin. I got 100% on the IM, 95% on the Sites cuz I stumbled over a few things (I blame Midterms, my head wasn't on Skills) and 95% on Insulin cuz dummy me, said I had to have a 34 unit total and then only pulled back to 24 units. I'm lucky I didn't fail that one.
• My Fundamentals Midterm, uh that wasn't so good. Like I said I favored studying for Pharm over this one so that was issue #1. Then the first round of students took it. The prof had to hand grade them cuz she thought the scantron did it wrong. Either it did or everyone bombed it! I still don't know. From what I heard, many of the students ended up with a score in the 70 percentile range.  Remember, for Nursing classes, a solid 80.00% is passing and it has to be on exam/quiz grades alone. A 79.99% is failing. No rounding up. Now my classes turn! Since it was paper we had to wait to the evening to see our grades. I worked up the courage to look at it (this coming from the girl who waited over a year to look at her final grades one semester). I got a 78%. FML!!!! One wrong too many. I failed it. My test/quiz grade is an 80.55% meaning I'm passing by 0.55% which is passing but I have to step it up.
• Now on to Clinical!!! Acute Care!!! Hospital!!!
• Orientation on Thursday was a lot of information especially since we do all the charting on a computer program that looks circa 1993. Takes me back to Plover/Whiting Computer Lab days!
• Unfortunately our instructor became ill so our orientation was cut short. 
• Friday we had a sub instructor and she was really cool! My first patient was awesome and very eager to cooperate. She said that I could be her nurse any day and that since she didn't have a daughter she was adopting me. 
• Clinical ended with a lot of shock. We have a huge paper and exam at the end that our instructor never told us about! So I became a bit overwhelmed, but as one of my classmates says, one day at a time. It's true, I just work one day at a time and chug my way through.

So my week started crazy and ended crazy. I'm just glad to be over midterms cuz they were insane!!!
Now I have 10 weeks down and only 7 weeks and 3 semesters to go!!! Next week is November, there is a light at the end of this tunnel!!!

2nd Semester? Already???

This week was a very different week. I only had one day of classes!  This is because we had advising and registration. It's like, really? Already? I don't even know if I'm going to make it to 2nd Semester! 

• Tuesday we had a regular day of classes. So skills and pharmacology.
• Wednesday was advising!
• We found out a little better what 2nd semester is all about. First of all it is divided into two separate eight week sections.  Why? Because 2nd semester has the pediatric clinical rotation.  Only one of the hospitals in the area has pediatrics so the goal is to get 48 students through that rotation in a 16 week period.  Each clinical has 8 students in it for 6 total groups. Since we can't do peds all at once we're all split up. Alas, 2 different groups.  Makes sense? Don't worry, I'm still confused too!
• So we found out which of the two groups we were in. I was hoping we could choose, but of course they choose for you. I got placed into group ABC. Which means I have pediatrics first. I'm PISSED!!! Cuz that means I have to drive all the way to Marshfield in the dead of winter. Thank you! I really don't believe their whole "we take into consideration where you live to place you in clinicals" philosophy. Cuz if they did, I'd have that rotation 2nd time around in March.
• So I talked to an adviser and shared my concerns about the January driving and she said to email the head instructor requesting a group switch because she agrees with my logic. All I got for a reply was "everyone has to drive and I can't make any promises" So I took that as toughen up or ship out!
• The second 8 week period is med-surg so that should be interesting. Word on the street is that the current 2nd semester students that just got done with it had 7 fails. Peds had 3 fails. Those are not good odds. 
• The rest of my week consisted of studying, studying, studying! Why? Because this next week is Midterms!!! Comprehensive Midterms! 1 of those in each Pharm & Fundamentals. Then I also have 2 quizzes in lab, one on each day. So I'm going crazy (hence the lateness of this entry).

This week, my friends, has brought us to the half way point and beyond.  I'm officially half way done with 1st Semester! I am in shock that I have made it this far and am so far not failing. I'm very impressed with myself.  I really believe it has something to do with the sister I asked for prayers from along with the sisters she works with and the children she minsters to in Peru. I also have countless others praying for me. It's definitely God's grace which is helping me through, cuz He knows there's no way I would be doing this on my own.

9 weeks down, 8 weeks and 3 semesters to go. I'm an eighth of the way through!!! HUZZAH!!!!

Injections and Roller Coasters

This week we are down to single digit weeks that are left in this semester. 

• I gave my very first injection on a real person!!! I was so nervous. Not only about sticking the needle in, but then pushing in the plunger too! I did an intradermal injection of saline. This is the type of injection that you would get for a TB test. I was able to get the ''wheel'' under the epidermal layer. So I did good. The next time it shouldn't be so bad.
• I had 2 quizzes this week. Fundamentals, which I got an 85% on, so not bad but not good either. And Pharmacology I got an 87.5%. I need to step up the studying.
• I had my last Long Term Care clinical day! Thank God it's over! I also had an article presentation and I think I did pretty well. So I'm hoping I got an okay grade on that.
• I had a second presentation for Fundamentals. It was my group presentation. We did very well and got 95% on it. So I'm happy that's over.
• I took a day off yesterday and went to Six Flags with David, Cory, Kassandra, Matthew and Jimmy.  I rode a ton of coasters. It was awesome! Not to mention it's Fright Fest so it's all decked out for Halloween. One of the creepers got me and I jumped. I also screamed my head off on the coasters (more for fun cuz that's part of the thrills! My throat doesn't feel so good today.  The only coaster I legitimately was scared on was Vertical Velocity, when I was riding it toward the back of the coaster you go so high up backwards it feels like you're going up and over. It freaked me out a bit. The second time I went on I rode closer to the front and it wasn't as good cuz you don't get that scary thrill like you do when you ride to the back. I was impressed with myself cuz I had always been terrified of Raging Bull, or going up the first lift. So when I went on it the first time I actually didn't even freak out about it. So the second time was awesome! I love roller coasters!  It was a great way to get my mind off of everything for a day

Time to get back to school, and I now have 8 weeks completed! Only 9 weeks to go!!

Busy Busy Bee

So this has been a very busy week. Now with classes 4 days a week and working 2 days a week, I feel like I don't have time to think. AHH!

• This week in skills lab is our first attempt to take the math test. The math test is about conversions and such so that you can calculate how much of a drug you are to give based on the doctor's order and the type and concentration of drug you have.  We practiced this weeks ago and I did very well. We were told that we have to pass with a 90% or better. It is only 20 questions long so we get up to 2 wrong. If you fail, you only get 2 more opportunities to take it. This is accompanied by extra tutoring and whatnot-nothing that I had time for. If you can not pass it in these three tries, you fail Skills Lab.  So when I went to study for it the night before just to refresh my memory, I was like what the heck! I'm not getting it! Why? Cuz I was rushing and not reading the whole question or not using my calculator. Well I made sure I took my time and I PASSED!!! I got a 95% and the one I got wrong was because I didn't read that the question said how many to give in a 24 hour period where I had only one dose. All my math was right!
• Clinical was still boring. I really didn't know what to do. Besides taking vitals on my resident, helping feed people and taking blood glucose readings, it was boring. So I'm looking forward to being done. Only one day left of Long Term Care, thank God!
• We started learning about injections in Skills Lab! Now this is what I've been waiting for! We practiced filling a syringe with insulin, using filter needles and finding intermuscular injection sites. I will not be looking forward to stabbing someone in the ventrogluteal, dorsalgluteal or vastus lateralis sites. That I think would hurt like a bitch!

Well I'm now 7 weeks in and I only have 10 weeks to go! Oh yea and three other semesters!

Fundamentals for Dummies

Not too much to report on for this last week.

• Last Monday was insane, after working the weekend and basically letting everything pile up until that night, I didn't take my Fundamentals quiz until 1:00am. Yea, that sucked. Note to self, when you work, get your frickin' work done on Friday!
• About that quiz? I got an 85%. Pretty bad, but now my quiz average is over 80% which is where it needs to be for me to pass the class. I just want to pass and  move on to 2nd semester with all my classmates! 
• Continuing on with Fundamentals, I have yet to find a nurse or nursing student who actually liked Fundamentals, including myself...
• This is why I borrowed the book "Fundamentals for Dummies" from the Hospice Nurse at work, because I need that book.
• I finished my first week of long term care clinical and it was very boring cuz there wasn't much to do and flexible, cuz the instructor kept changing things. All in all I got through it.
• I almost forgot to e-mail my clinical homework. I finished it on Saturday but I just kept putting off emailing it. This morning at work I'm like "OH SHIT!!!" But thank God I had until 4pm today to do it, and I emailed it off at 3:30 when I got home. Saved by the bell!
• I tested out of the Medication Passing skill, with 100% athankya! I better have since I do that for my job! However, it is a little different when I'm learning in school, verses doing it at work.
• My brain is done thinking so therefore my post is complete.

6 weeks down! 11 weeks and 3 semesters to go!

Can I go to sleep? Just for 20 minutes?

I am so freaking tired!!!!!! After stressing over Pharmacology last week followed by a 3 day work stretch, not to mention hardly any sleep, This child is ready to crash and burn!!

• I had three quizzes last week. Yes three. I had two in skills lab and one in pharmacology. I did fairly well in them. And realized that I most likely studied too hard for pharm. Oh well, I got 95%, 90% and 97.5%. I rocked the pharm one. I win! Hopefully that trend will continue.
• I started clinical!!! On Thursday I had orientation at school. I found out just how much my workload is going to increase per week. Surprisingly it's not going to be so bad. Especially cuz I get Clinical. 
• Being there is no different than work, except I have a different resident and instead of 11, I only have to worry about 1/2 of one! Well that's cuz I have a partner so basically I only have to do half the work. I guess another difference will be that I get to play "Nurse" instead of "CNA." However, at work I pretty much get to do almost all the stuff the RN would, due to being delegated to. However I will have to see just how it goes, since when I actually got to go to clinical on Friday, it was more of an orientation.  
• I tested out of Oxygen Therapy in Skills Lab as a nervous wreck not knowing what I was doing and pulled it off flawlessly.
• I'm really starting to hate working Saturday, Sunday & Monday in a row. The weekends are just exhausting due to the increased workload I have to do and the fact it's impossible to be done by 3:00pm. However, I get money so it's a win-lose situation. I have to deal cuz next semester I may be down to 1 day a week.
• My brain can't think of anything else.

Well there you have it. 5 weeks down, 12 weeks and 3 semesters to go. I can do this!

Let the stress begin!!!

A bit late with my weekly blog entry, but as the title states, the stress has begun. Mostly with the internet stuff. Most of my classes are web enhanced meaning there are a whole new mess of problems. We have to submit worksheets on this wonderful invention called "Blackboard" but I have a better name for it that I'm not going to share now... Anywho I do these worksheets, feel really good about them and then hit submit and I get my grade which is usually somewhere between 60-65%. I know in other degree programs it's like Yea!! D for Diploma!!! But in nursing that's basically a BIG, FAT F! Well all the frustration has led to hard copies in Skills Lab (Horray!) and now in Pharmacology (the bane of my existence. I will be surprised if I pass this theory class) we are able to have multiple attempts. For example. If we have to type in the answer and the question goes what do you avoid with this drug? Well the book says "alcohol" and you put that as your answer, well the worksheet says WRONG! It's alcoholic beverages. Or if you have two answers such as BUN & Creatinine, well you better put them in the right order cuz the computer says WRONG! It's Creatinine & BUN. So it makes for a very frustrating learning experience. Making me want to throw my computer across the room.  That's prolly the biggest revelation of this last week. Here is the breakdown of other important things:

• I had my blood glucose tested! I was terrified due to a horrible experience in Physiology Lab at UWSP. However I had someone poke me that knew what they were doing and it didn't even hurt! I think my psychotic fear of having my finger poked is now over!!! I had a Blood Glucose Level of 86mg/dl. So I'm on the higher side of normal (which is 60-100mg/dl). I thought for sure I'd have crazy high blood sugar what with my unhealthy obsession with sugar, not to mention I had drank over half of a Medium Dunkin' Donuts Vanilla Bean Oreo Coolata. Can we say delicious?!!?
• I tested out of another Skill: Infant Heel Stick for blood glucose testing. Poor baby...
• I took my first internet quiz in Fundamentals. Uh not horrible but not so good either. Now I at least know what to expect. Here's to hoping the next one is better...
• My final week without clinical...which means that I have 2 less days a week to do homework. I can't spread it out so much anymore so this kinda sucks!
• My final week w/out clinical!!! I get to start them!!! I'm excited to begin!!!
• I had the weekend off which was awesome! I got so much done but I still have so much homework left to do. 
• I have 3 quizzes next week. 2 in Skills Lab and 1 in Pharmacology. God (and St. Joey Coup) help me!!
• Went to confession and had a very good healing/cleansing one. I hadn't felt like that since going to St. Pete's in Steubes. Having a clean slate makes it a lot easier to handle this school stuff. I have a lot less stuff hanging on. Not to mention I can receive the Eucharist again which is awesome in it's own way! I believe that this priest will be the one I'm gonna go to for confession from now on.
• I need to fine myself a spiritual director (so says my new confessor). So I have more homework. God make one fall in my lap! Athankya...
• My foot is getting so much better and it's not swollen anymore! I can almost walk on it without pain.  It's healing and I'm glad cuz I wanted it to be better by clinical.
• Oh and the wine I'm drinking right now? Is Anesso Cagnina di Romagna. It is very cheap and very good. It's quickly become my favorite. I love the tasting wall at Cellar 70. Try something before you buy a whole bottle. That's where I found this one. Yummy.

 Well that's all I can think of right now. 4 Weeks down. 13 Weeks & 3 Semesters to go!

Tips to help you succeed....

Well my friends, I have survived week 3!!! Only 14 more weeks go to, holy crap how did that happen so fast!?!?! This week wasn't so bad. There was a teacher day on Tuesday so we had NO class! It allowed me ample catch up time and extra time to study for my quiz I had on Wednesday. My week in review:

• I have spent more time in two of the Portage County Public Libraries in the last 2 weeks than in my whole life. I will most likely have to start migrating to the UWSP library cuz it's open later than the public libraries.
• I have been doing awesome on my discussion question papers. They have been flawless points wise! Which I need cuz I need all the points I can get. One of my profs even commented that she enjoys reading my writing style. I guess my Bachelor of Arts degree with all the hundreds of pages of essays and papers written has definitely paid off! Oh and the fact I know how to cite sources and write bibliographies helps a lot too!
• I tested out of another skill in skills lab. I can now do wound cares in my clinical! (I have even learned some new tips and tricks for how to do wound care at work. And I'm not talking about going out of my scope of practice, but tips for aseptic technique).
• I took my first quiz! It was in Skills Lab and I got a 93% on it! Only 2 wrong. That gave me a HUGE confidence boost. It's like "maybe I CAN pass, well skills lab at least!"
• I have a quiz in Fundamentals that opens up on Sunday at noon and closes on Tuesday at 7AM. It's online and you basically get question 1 and you answer it and click next. Then you can't go back. It's timed and you take it at home. Needless to say I'm scared shitless. The idea of reading a question and not being able to go back to it terrifies me.  They tell you not to read into questions, well so if I don't know it right away I usually will skip it and go back. Well I can't anymore. So this should be interesting. I'll either do fine or I'll bomb it. 
• We had an optional seminar to go to on Tips To Help You Succeed. We also got extra credit for fundamentals! The nursing counselor gave it. I really enjoyed it. I did get some new outlooks on the program.  He told us to make lists of why we are doing this, our goal as to why we want to be nurses. Mine went something like this:
• The Paycheck!
• I want to buy a house and a newer car
• I want to go to Europe and that's my reward to myself for graduating
• I don't want to be a CNA forever
• I want to prove past teachers wrong who said I'd never be a nurse, let alone get into a nursing program. Well I proved them wrong on the later. Gotta love teachers who crush your dreams
• I want to hand my dad my first paycheck to show him and my mom that their investment in my education was worth it
• I don't want to work in Youth Ministry anymore
• Then we made a list of things that can deter us from succeeding and if they are controllable then we need to control it and if it's uncontrollable, let it go.
• He also gave us tips on studying that I'm putting into use today to see how it affects my learning
• Yesterday we also had to take this beyond stupid test. It was horrid! I actually did equal or better than all the people I took it with and was pretty much on the same page as the national scores but I got a 64% on it. That is horrid! At least it wasn't anything to do with nursing.
• Then we took a personality test! Thank you for telling me what I already know! Needless to say none of us were ready to be told we were stupid at 8 o'clock in the morning.

 Well next week should be interesting. It's my last week without clinical and then I really need to learn when to study since I will no longer have Thursday and Friday off. This will be a busy weekend cuz I work Saturday, Sunday & Monday. Hopefully I'll get all my work and studying done and actually get better than an 80% on my quiz. Pray for me!

Legit

It's the end of week 2 and I survived (kinda). What did I do?

• Read a shit ton more homework
• Finished all my worksheets (some better than others)
• Find out I actually did better than what the computer said since the prof goes back and fixes the computer errors. Samantha I, Blackboard O!
•  Bought my stethoscope. I really had no choice in the color matter. I needed one and there was no time to order it online. My choices were the display model which was bubblegum barbie pink, uh I'll pass (display models are not for me) or the clear pink one which is what I ended up buying. If I really don't like it I'll just order one off of amazon and it will be Yellow.

My clear pink stethoscope!

Here's Volume I, but Volume II is nowhere to be found :(

• All of my books are FINALLY here, and I went through them just to make sure and realized that my Med-Surg book, which is a 2 volume book only came with volume 1. So I have to send that one back and order a new one. At least I get my money back!

• Tested out of 2 more skills this week: Apical Pulse and 2-Step Blood Pressure!
• This weekend is a holiday weekend so there is no school Monday which I don't have class anyway so it doesn't matter. To make things better, there's some teacher thing on Tuesday so I have no class on Tuesday! I have a week off of classes!!! 
• I have my first quiz on Wednesday and have no idea how to study for it. This could be painful!
• I got my Varicella booster yesterday and my TB skin test placed. The nurses at Ruth Gilfrey suck. I know they are very cheap vaccinations, but they suck at giving immunizations. After my catastrophic time last month I still had a bad experience. The varicella hurt like hell and it's swelled up again and looks nasty. The TB was interesting too. She didn't know how to take the sub-dermal needle out of my skin because my skin was separating from my arm. Instead of pulling it out of my skin sideways she pulled straight up. Woman where the hell did you go to school?!? No fun!

The wonderful welt from my Varicella Booster

•  Even though I had a bad experience, at least my health work is done!! Now I just have to go back and get my TB checked tomorrow and as there's no bump today it's highly unlikely the bump will come back and test positive.  

Finally, why do I call my post Legit? Because yesterday we had our photos taken for our Clinical ID's and my skills lab prof said that we are now Legit Nursing Students! I hope things are still going good next week, as I don't feel so overwhelmed this week as I had last week.

I'm Legit and have a huge shadow on my face (but everyone's did :)

New Life - New Name

Wine Colored Scrubs.  This is the new working title of my blog. Why do you ask? Well you see I am no longer a "Nurse in Limbo". Limbo is gone and now I am a week into Nursing School!!! It has FINALLY arrived!  That means I have a new life. Which as I've found in the last 5 days consists of 90% school, 5% sleep and 5% other activities.  And I've only had 2 days of classes so far. This also means my blog has a new name. When I go to clinical I have to wear wine colored scrubs, so I liked that concept for my blog. I also really like to drink wine, so maybe I'll share some of what I'm drinking at the time! Then there is the quote by Bl. Mother Teresa of Calcutta, "They are all Jesus in disguise." People ask me all the time how I can deal with all the 'blood & guts' stuff that comes with nursing? Well just working as a CNA I've always thought of Jesus saying, "When you fed the hungry, clothed the naked, ect. You did it for me." So I've always looked at it that way. This is part of my purgatory, this will help me get to Heaven, all the while helping out those who need someone to love and care for them while they are sick.

Onto Nursing School! What's happened so far?

• Paid my tuition $1,375
• I have purchased about $700 worth of books and syllibi
• I have purchased $36 worth of scrubs (Yay for going out of business sales that saved me $150!)
• I started studying last Saturday (yup, before classes began) and found that I'm in way over my head
• Cut down my hours at work from 40+ to 16 per week
• Started classes on Tuesday and actually felt somewhat prepared! (yay me!)
• Studied Tuesday night and started asking myself why I got myself into this and it's 2 years long!
• Early Wednesday morning woke up nauseous and pukey (which made for a great 2nd day of school)
• Learned skills and tested out of 4 of them all the while trying not to puke/pass out!
• We have to test out of skills in order to do them at clinical, that's called staying in our scope of practice! (see, I'm already learning ;)
• Slept from the time I got home on Wednesday until this morning. I'm feeling about 90% back to normal.
• Found out my clinical site! I'll be in Wisconsin Rapids at Strawberry Lane and Riverview Hospital
• I'm hoping this means I can get my clinical site in Stevens Point next semester when it's snowing cuz I really don't want to drive to Marshfield or Adams for an entire semester!
•  I have about 20+ hours of homework/studying to do before I go back to classes on Tuesday
• I will be buying a stethoscope tomorrow (I still don't know what color I want!)
• I will go to work Saturday, Sunday & Monday
• I will be getting my 2nd Varicella Vaccine and my 2nd TB test placed on Tuesday 

Ah Nursing School. You are here and I never thought this day would come! Wish me luck as I start out on this crazy journey. Prayers are very much appreciated for my sanity and so that I can learn what I need to, pass my classes and get through 1st Semester!
Blessed Maria Restituta Kafka, my Nursing School Patron, Pray for Me!
She's pretty awesome! Check her out here!

It Seems Like a Fine Day for an Update!

It's been a while, so here's an update of my boring life:

1. I have been trucking along at my job, made the 11 month mark yesterday! Woohoo!!! Country Store free for almost a year! I can now say that I will have done every job possible as of this Saturday. Work the Floor, Pass Meds, Activities, act as the Director and the last one I will start on Saturday: Cook, ugh! Shoot me! I only have 2 weeks left there as a full time employee. I will be cutting down to 2 days a week due to the fact that I am....
2. Starting Nursing School!!! 2 weeks from today!!! Am I scared? That would be an understatement! I'm terrified! I am so not ready to hit the books, my year an a half break from school was wonderful!!! Although it did take me several months to get that feeling of "Time to Study" off of my brain. Now it's time to put it back in there, that is if my brain has any room left in it. With starting I have to finish checking things off of my list like:
3. Being CPR re-certified! Which I did, with my mom, on Sunday. It was just the two of us and we had a lot of fun. It's amazing what can change in the few years since I took the class the last time. 
4. CPR isn't the only thing I had to do. I needed to obtain immunization records of MMR (check!) and get a stupid Varicella shot (even though I've already had the Chicken Pox) because I had found a loop hole!!! It was either get a titer (a blood test proving immunity to MMR and the Pox) or just get the immunization. I choose the later and oh boy did I pay for it!
5. When I got my immunizations, (yes, plural) they told me my Tetanus/Diphtheria was due in a year and a half, and well since I was there I should just get that one since I hadn't had the booster that contained the Pertussis vaccine in it. So I walked into the room to get my shots and there were two women in there and they were like, "We're gonna give you your shots at the same time!" I was ecstatic since I hate shots and I only had to do it once, not twice! I was told the TDaP wouldn't hurt, but my arm would more than likely be sore later, but the Varicella would hurt upon injection and then be fine after it was done. Uh, in my case, let's reverse that!  The Varicella didn't hurt at all, but the TDaP hurt like a bitch!!! I think the girl that did that was training cuz she took forever to give it then commentated on it by saying "It's squirting". I got this shot on July 17th and yesterday (August 6th) was the first day I no longer could see the bruise at the injection site. Not to mention my arm killed for like 2 weeks and I couldn't lift any of my residents on my left side for a week. Then a few days after my shots, the injection site of the Varicella swelled up like a balloon and I got several pox on my body, one that is just finally going away. I still need to get the booster for that one in 10 days. Oh joy! I've never had reactions to immunizations like this before. I guess in my old age, my body can't take it.
6. I also need to have two TB (tuberculosis) tests done. I already  have one done thanks to work! So I need to go get another one. That one's not so bad, so I'm not too worried about that one giving me any grief.
7. Uniforms. As a Nursing Student you need to have a very specific type of scrubs for clinical. Specific brand, specific style and specific color. Oh except you can have any type of white pants (shrugs shoulders). The top and matching pants have to be the lovely wine color which I've heard that once you are done with school you will never wear again. Well I still wear my CNA clinical scrubs so we'll see how sick I get of them. I actually lucked out in this category as normally each piece will cost you anywhere from 20-25 bucks a pop. Well a uniform store closed down here in Spring and 2 weeks ago had brought all their leftover inventory out of storage and sold it for $6 a piece. I found all that I needed. I have 3 shirts and 3 pants and I paid a whopping total of $36 for them!!! I wasn't paying attention to one of the shirts I got and I don't really like the pocket placements on it, so I think I'll see if someone wants to buy that one off of me. But I'm still happy that I got 3 sets for less than the price of 1. Winning!!!
8. Today I am buying my books. It will put a nice dent in my credit card and savings account. But I am fine with this because in my program you buy most of your books 1st semester and one or two for each of the other 3 semesters. So my biggest book bill will be now! 
9. On a non-school note, I was able to go Up North to Hayward this month!!! We did get stranded, as is the tradition. It was on the island this year. It started storming and we only had canoes, a kayak and one boat with a motor. So we had to go deep into the woods of the island and try to take shelter from the storm. It was a great memory to add to the vacation books. I also had fun swimming, sitting at campfires, shopping, eating tons of ice cream and just hanging out with my cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, brothers, nieces and nephews. Successful vacation? I think so!

   

   Kissing the frog I caught, hoping he turns into a handsome prince. He didn't.

   As my time as a Nurse in Limbo comes to an end, I will be having to change my blog name, so we'll see what my brain comes up with.

Updating My Blog?

I just published a post that I typed up over a year ago. It is unfinished but it doesn't matter cuz I don't remember what I was going to say next. Anywho, I'll just write up this new post since I haven't done it in a Coon's Age!

First of all, life has been going on as normal, with some new developments! Good and Scary developments! Here they are in no particular order:

1) In April I received two letters from Mid-State. The first said that I had orientation in two weeks and the other told me what I needed to have by said orientation date. I was like "Holy Crap! I actually get to start some classes in August! Huzzah!!!" I also needed to go all the way to Rapids to the bookstore to buy an orientation packet. I took Kassandra along and purchased the packet. We also stopped at a Uniform store where I purchased two pairs of scrub pants, one pair was a dark green the other a bright blue and a scrub top which is light blue with blue and green flower pattern things that matched both pairs of pants. We also stopped in at some bridal shops.

2) That brings me to the next point: The Wedding. I have been asked to be in my cousin Michelle's wedding. The week before my trip to Rapids we went to Appleton dress shopping. Oh please dear God, that was painful, never let me do that again! As painful as it was I'll be happy with whatever dress she finally decides on and I'll wear it proudly on May 25, 2013. So that's why Kass and I stopped at those bridal shops to see if any dresses caught our eyes as to what Michelle wants. Kass and I have very different tastes on the dresses and what I like she doesn't and vice versa. That's why I'll be happy with what Michelle picks, it's her day and I would hope she wouldn't make us wear a big bow on our ass (which she says she's not. Well Thank God!!)

3)  Back to Nursing School. I went to orientation and as it turns out, I've been bumped so far up on the list that I start ALL my classes in August! Nursing Fundamentals, Nursing Pharmacology, Lab & Clinical. Woohoo! In 2 years I should be Samantha Klish, RN, STB? I'm still not sure what the appropriate letters are that go behind my name for my Bachelor in Theology. My goal is to make my RN into a BSN. Apparently you can transfer your Mid-State Nursing Credits to the UW system and upgrade your degree. I have (I think) all those requirements met from attending UWSP and Franciscan. Lets hope, I don't want to pay more tuition! Prior to starting classes I need to have several things done. I need two TB tests (one I have done already and I have to get another in August). Become CPR re-certified. Get a titer to make sure I'm immune to MMR and Chicken Pox. Even though I had those Pox I still need to be immune. I do not want to do this, I hate needles! I will probably freak myself out from this and cry.

4) Before I freak myself out thinking about the titer, I'm going to talk about work. I have begun passing meds! Yay! I get to give my residents their pharmacy of drugs now! It's a nice break from working the floor. Less stress and less call lights. However, it comes with more responsibility. You can not have errors and you have a lot to accomplish. Making sure they are given out. That the resident actually swallows it. You have marked it off in the MAR. Lots to do but I'm getting better at it every day. The worst part is giving them out cuz they all just don't take them. They argue with you, hit you, spit them out at you, swear at you, etc. Oh I love my residents. I just wish there was a cure for Alzheimer's/Dementia.

5) I am going Up North this summer! WooHoo! Last year I had to stay behind and watch the shit store for my aunt. I'm so thankful to have washed my hands of that place. I have now been at my new job for 9 months at the end of next week. The time has FLOWN! Since I've been there I haven't requested any days off or called in sick. So I BETTER get my week off for Hayward, otherwise let the call-in's start! It will be nice to live there for a week. So many good times! I'm just curious as to when we will get stranded again. Will it be on the island? Or on a broat again? Oh the stories we can tell! Rescue broat 911 to the rescue!!!

6) So as I begin my Nursing classes in August I suppose I'll have to re-name my blog. I will no longer at that point be a "Nurse in Limbo". Limbo will end. Perhaps Nursing Student in Limbo? I dunno. I have a couple months to think about it.

Limbo has an Expiration Date!

It has been two weeks since I have received news that my "Limbo" has an expiration date! I received my Nursing Acceptance letter! I'm in! I'm a Nursing Student! No longer am I a "Pre-Nursing" Major or a "Conditionally Accepted" Nursing Student! I am a full fledged, in-the-program Nursing Student!!! I have a start date of January 2013! Which is awesome! The letter also said that depending on availability I could start taking two Nursing Coursed in August 2012! They don't have clinical but who cares! I could be actually taking Nursing Classes in 17 months! I never thought this day would get here, knowing that I finally have a start date. I received my enroll letter before March 1st, and we weren't supposed to start receiving them until after the 1st.

The funny thing about this post is that I started it a long time ago. I should just post it now and then I'll re-write one about the here and now. Oh procrastination!

I want to be remembered as...

Yesterday I had a continuing education class at work. The state of Wisconsin requires us to have 15 hours of continuing education a year to be able to continue working in healthcare. If you are unaware, I work for North Haven Homes which Specializes in Dementia and Alzheimer's care. This means I get kicked, slapped, tripped, stabbed, spit at, called every 4-letter word in the book, etc... This seems crazy, yea I know, however, the more I understand the disease and learn about it, the more I just keep caring for my residents and giving them everything I can to make their days that much more better, even if they don't remember 5 minutes after the fact. Anywho, each resident has hanging by their room an "About Me" poem. It includes things like birthdays, religion, children, grand children, jobs, hobbies, travels, etc. These are so much fun to read cuz you get to know who that person is and not just their disease. The last part of each poem goes "I want to be remembered as..." most of them say a good wife/husband and mother/father. I often think about what mine would say if I died lets say today. Well it just so happens that that question was posed on us yesterday at the continuing ed meeting. When it came to my turn I was like "I have no idea."  Some things were suggested like "compassionate" or "outspoken" but to say those or things other people said would be lies. This has been bothering me me since the meeting and the only thing I can think of is that I want to be remembered as a Saint. And I mean that in the most humblest way possible. I also know that I am very far from that so I think I have to change somethings and actually be a saint so that when I die people can remember me as that. I don't think in my short 26 years I've accomplished anything to be remembered by and I wouldn't even mind being forgotten. For now, I'll just try to come up with a better answer.

Narrow Gate

So I'm pretty moral, for the most part. I teach Theology of the Body, so I have to live what I teach or as best as I possibly can. Well tonight while out, I just observed the people around me. These people are drinking like fish, and the dancing. I'm not a dancer, AT ALL. You won't catch me grinding, I'd have to be pretty out of my head to do that kinda thing anymore. But the one thing that really struck me was what is it like to live without morals? To not care who you hook up with? To just do what you feel like? To suffocate your conscience and to (as Obama is trying to force us) violate it? As I go through Lent, I guess I'm thankful that I've tried to change my ways as best as I can. Those kinds of things make me uncomfortable and I'm really glad that they do. Who knows what kind of situation I'd be in right now if I didn't have the formed conscience I do now? Not that I'm perfect, by any means, but I'm glad I've chosen the path I have.

"Enter through the narrow gate;  for the gate is wide and the road broad that leads to destruction, and those who enter through it are many. How narrow the gate and constricted the road that leads to life. And those who find it are few."
- Matthew 7:13-14

Ah, Behold the Power of Lent!

Lent is upon us and sometimes that can mean a whole hecka lot, or not so much to me. As I look at Lent's past, I see my Lenten Promises and what I can do different this year. Some years I did crazy things, others not much. As I reflect on Lenten past I see a pattern. I get really lazy/bored/uninspired? I can't necessarily describe it around the January/February time. A lot of the time, I start missing Mass. I just don't have the desire to go or necessarily want to go. And that is horrible. I do the same thing around late July/early August. I usually don't do this twice a year, just once. Well I just did that in the last month. With Lent coming up, I forced myself to go to Mass again. I'm not like super-hyper Franciscan Student about Mass right now, but I'm making myself go - no matter if I 'get anything out of it' or not. Lent is about sacrifice and that is why we make Lenten Promises. It's not about 'giving something up' but it's supposed to, in the end, make you holier. I sub taught the 7th graders on Ash Wednesday and presented them with a list of 100+ things to 'do/give up' for Lent. I didn't make them choose any of them, I just gave them some suggestions for something different than the 'give up candy/tv' usuals. It never fails, an Ash Wednesday doesn't go by without hearing the "I'm giving school up for Lent" thing which means I have to explain why that's not the point. It gets old, but I'm sure as long as I'm a CCD teacher I will ALWAYS hear that.
Needless to say, I'm not giving up candy for Lent this year or tv. I'm not going to divulge what Lenten Promises I'm doing, all I know is that in the end, I want to be out of this desert and somewhat back into my faith life that means something to me. A few years back, one of the Friars at FUS read a letter that the Bishop Daniel Conlon wrote to all the people of the Diocese. He asked us to abstain from meat every Friday for retributions against the sin of abortion and for an end to abortion. At first it was like, "Really? No meat on Fridays? Ever?" But I was up to the challenge. I'm not saying I have 100% accuracy, but it sure makes it more tolerable to fast during Lent, when I'm so used to Fasting on the majority of the Friday's of the year. Basically it was some good training, because it makes no meat Friday's in Lent not something to pout about. It gives me the courage to say, "I can do this!!!"
Some people are able to make their Lenten Promises and follow through with them flawlessly. They are some pretty remarkable people, especially when they are pretty tough challenges. I'm not that good, I slip, stumble and fall. I'm imperfect. I was just reading my reflection today in my "Give Us This Day" book. (It's seriously awesome, it contains Morning Prayer, a reflection on the saint of the day or a holy person, Mass Readings, a Reflection about the readings and Evening Prayer.) Today's reflection says:

"Have you stumbled upon this surefire way of connecting with God?
If you can be brave enough this Lent to let your heart be broken (again) by your own patterns of missing the mark, God promises to hear you, and heal you." 

When I read this I was like, okay, this speaks to me. I have been stumbling with connecting with God. I'm also not perfect, and I sometimes miss the mark. However, if I keep going to God, whether I'm 'getting anything out of it or not' I have to remember that He a) Hears me and b) will heal me. Wow! I love it! If you want to read reflections by the author, check out Kathy McGovern's website at http://www.thestoryandyou.com/.  That list of 100+ things to do for Lent I talked about earlier, included suggestions for those who are addicted to the internet, which I'm sadly one of. Instead of just giving up the internet, one of the suggestions was for those who blog, to write an entry about God/your religion/Lent once a week. So I'm going to try to do that. Somehow, I think these posts are rather just ramblings and such. Oh well. I'm trying and I'm not forcing anyone else to read it ;) Anywho, Lent has begun and behold it's power!

I took this picture a couple of years ago at The Shrine of Christ's Passion in St. John, Indiana.